Don’t we all envy those obviously in love? Time and troubles seem to just melt away for lovers. Someone said that “love’s power is to unite in the face of loneliness and eternity, and in its optimism in the face of daunting odds.”
Be aware, however, of those who love being in love, as they might be in love with themselves for being in love, rather than with the actual beloved. This kind of narcissistic love fades sooner than later. And be aware of those who love a particular thing or two about the beloved, rather than the beloved as such. What if someone with more lovable goods comes along?
Once lovers get over these illusions and delusions or pseudo-loves — which are so characteristic of romantic love, the bonding begins to stand on firmer grounds. That is if the relationship survives this early stage of romantic love – of wanting to be a new we, real love might come about as soon as the two had fair time to further attune to each other.
Love may function to be a constantly unfolding quest for truth. Each lover will find new things about him or herself as well as the other, like desires they never knew each had. When these desires will be shared desires — which at times they are not — all will most likely be good.
Seeing the world from a new perspective of two-as-one opens vistas prior unimaginable to any single. New opportunities, wonders, liabilities, and even threats will forge the two into an amazingly creative union. Yes, love is transformative – this is what most people love about it!
This quest perhaps began with the chance encounter, an event that forever changes two individuals, challenging them to see the world from the point of view of two rather than one. Romantic love ensued and matured to become sane, sound, and sensible love — love that is reason-responsive, grounded in reality, and in agreement with lovers’ overall mindset.
Passionate, intimate, and committed love, when encountered, is fabulous, precious, amazing, creates new beginnings, makes us more wholesome (rarely completely), and surely makes life worth living.
The unifying power of love urges us not to fear it but to see it as a magnificent undertaking that compels us to explore others and to move away from an obsession with ourselves.
[…] important as it not only helps a single to avoid isolation or loneliness, but in that it is also a process of discovery – including the discovery of meaning. French philosopher Alain Badiou’s essay, In Praise of Love, and recommending giving love a […]